GUILTY PLEASURES?
THE OTHER MORNING I heard a radio minister call guilt a sin. What a startling idea.
GUILT IS OFTEN MY NORMAL STATE. Guilt, that mixture of shame and remorse, is the way I normally deal with all the things I’ve done I wish I hadn’t and all the things I haven’t done that I wish I had.
I THINK OF REMORSE as regret tinged with sadness. That feeling I get when I’ve done something that hurts someone else. Guilt brings shame to remorse, and it’s the shame that eats me up. It won’t leave me alone. It can drive me to self-loathing. It convinces me I’m unworthy and unforgivable.
AND IF I TRULY BELIEVE I AM UNFORGIVABLE, there is little reason to look for grace. I can trick myself into believing that my suffering—whatever its source—is deserved, and I am to blame after all.
CLEARLY I NEED TO GO BACK to the story of David and Bathsheba (2 Sam 11 and 12), because if anyone has cause to feel guilt, that would be David.
AFTER A NAP, while standing on his rooftop, David sees Bathsheba bathing. Today he’d be considered a peeping Tom, but he was a king, so I suppose no one would have thought about calling the police.
HE SENDS MESSENGERS to bring Bathsheba to him. Suffice it to say that she couldn’t say, “no,” to the most powerful man in Jerusalem who also happened to be in charge of her husband’s career. We don’t know her degree of willingness, so perhaps what followed could be considered no worse than adultery (by both of them, not just her). I leave the “r” word out of the discussion.
IN THE NEXT VERSE she sends someone to tell David she’s pregnant. What now? David tries to trick her husband. But, Uriah is a dedicated officer, and he won’t leave the troops under his command who are living rough to go home and “wash his feet,” as David suggests. (It doesn’t take a lot of imagination to know what that refers to.)
THINGS MIGHT GET NASTY if David doesn’t come up with a solution, so he positions Uriah in an upcoming battle where he’ll be killed. Bathsheba mourns as quickly as possible. David marries her. Problem solved.
HOW’S DAVID FEELING about all this? The Bible doesn’t say, but it does take Nathan the prophet to point out David’s shortcomings to him. The Lord isn’t pleased. The child will die.
DOES DAVID GO INTO AGONIES of guilt? Not at all. He admits his sin. He fasts. He lays on the ground. All this in hopes the Lord will spare the child. But, after the child actually dies, David cleans up, goes into the house of the Lord and worships then heads home for a meal.
HE’S BEEN FORGIVEN. There will be no more Uriah-events in his future. What’s done is done. The past can’t be undone. There is only the future—a new start and an opportunity to do better.
THAT IS HOW HE AND BATHSHEBA treat their second son, Solomon, whom the prophet Nathan renames Jedidiah, “Beloved of the Lord”, the symbol of God’s forgiveness. Solomon is their opportunity to make a second start.
GIVEN ALL THAT, if David did not feel guilt, doesn’t allow his sins to separate him from God, how can I possibly think my sins, which thus far haven’t amounted to anything approaching David’s, are worthy of it?
THE RADIO PREACHER was right. Guilt is a sin—the sin of underestimating God and His ability to forgive. In this new year, I’m going to stop indulging myself in guilty pleasures.
You’re blessed. Be a blessing.
GUILT IS OFTEN MY NORMAL STATE. Guilt, that mixture of shame and remorse, is the way I normally deal with all the things I’ve done I wish I hadn’t and all the things I haven’t done that I wish I had.
I THINK OF REMORSE as regret tinged with sadness. That feeling I get when I’ve done something that hurts someone else. Guilt brings shame to remorse, and it’s the shame that eats me up. It won’t leave me alone. It can drive me to self-loathing. It convinces me I’m unworthy and unforgivable.
AND IF I TRULY BELIEVE I AM UNFORGIVABLE, there is little reason to look for grace. I can trick myself into believing that my suffering—whatever its source—is deserved, and I am to blame after all.
CLEARLY I NEED TO GO BACK to the story of David and Bathsheba (2 Sam 11 and 12), because if anyone has cause to feel guilt, that would be David.
AFTER A NAP, while standing on his rooftop, David sees Bathsheba bathing. Today he’d be considered a peeping Tom, but he was a king, so I suppose no one would have thought about calling the police.
HE SENDS MESSENGERS to bring Bathsheba to him. Suffice it to say that she couldn’t say, “no,” to the most powerful man in Jerusalem who also happened to be in charge of her husband’s career. We don’t know her degree of willingness, so perhaps what followed could be considered no worse than adultery (by both of them, not just her). I leave the “r” word out of the discussion.
IN THE NEXT VERSE she sends someone to tell David she’s pregnant. What now? David tries to trick her husband. But, Uriah is a dedicated officer, and he won’t leave the troops under his command who are living rough to go home and “wash his feet,” as David suggests. (It doesn’t take a lot of imagination to know what that refers to.)
THINGS MIGHT GET NASTY if David doesn’t come up with a solution, so he positions Uriah in an upcoming battle where he’ll be killed. Bathsheba mourns as quickly as possible. David marries her. Problem solved.
HOW’S DAVID FEELING about all this? The Bible doesn’t say, but it does take Nathan the prophet to point out David’s shortcomings to him. The Lord isn’t pleased. The child will die.
DOES DAVID GO INTO AGONIES of guilt? Not at all. He admits his sin. He fasts. He lays on the ground. All this in hopes the Lord will spare the child. But, after the child actually dies, David cleans up, goes into the house of the Lord and worships then heads home for a meal.
HE’S BEEN FORGIVEN. There will be no more Uriah-events in his future. What’s done is done. The past can’t be undone. There is only the future—a new start and an opportunity to do better.
THAT IS HOW HE AND BATHSHEBA treat their second son, Solomon, whom the prophet Nathan renames Jedidiah, “Beloved of the Lord”, the symbol of God’s forgiveness. Solomon is their opportunity to make a second start.
GIVEN ALL THAT, if David did not feel guilt, doesn’t allow his sins to separate him from God, how can I possibly think my sins, which thus far haven’t amounted to anything approaching David’s, are worthy of it?
THE RADIO PREACHER was right. Guilt is a sin—the sin of underestimating God and His ability to forgive. In this new year, I’m going to stop indulging myself in guilty pleasures.
You’re blessed. Be a blessing.
posted by Chronic Hope at 4:56 PM
2 Comments:
the cynic in me is to say that catholics would never rid themselves of sin if guilt is a sin.
The cynic in ME makes me think God doesn't think much of women (and certainly not Bathsheba) to let a child die just to make a point to Ol' David.
I think sins are what keep people from being in good relationship with G*d. So maybe some times guilt is one, but maybe sometimes it is restorative.
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